Letter to 'Anon'...

In response to this comment left on last night's post -

Anon said...

"I am a friend, who offers support and love whenever possible." Glad you included whenever possible, but it should say whenever you could be bothered.

Dear Anon

I said, 'whenever possible', because it isn't always possible to offer the love and support that everyone needs, all the time. Quite often we need to learn to love and support ourselves before we are capable of giving it out. If our own tanks are empty, we have nothing to give. It's as simple as that.

You are obviously someone who I have hurt or disappointed in the past. If this is the case, then I am sorry. You must know me to some extent, but how much of me do you really understand? Do you understand on an intimate level, what pains and heartaches I have been through? Are you aware of the amount of inner strength I've needed to call upon to get through the last 8 months, or even the last 8 days? Sometimes we all need to turn inside and work through the darkness on our own, and sometimes this means that we need to shut others out. Turn our backs on the distractions, and deal with our own demons. Maybe you've misread my indifference to you?

If my blog upsets you, then you have the choice not to read it. I don't always share what I write for the benefit of others. I write it for myself. It's a way for me to clear my mind, put things in perspective, and make sense of the everyday. And it doesn't always make sense!

Like I said in last nights post - I'm not perfect.

I just do the best I can.

Sending you love,

The Everyday Mum

I am amazing!

I am a mother, who would do anything for her children.

I am a friend, who offers support and love whenever possible.

I am a lover, who gives and receives affection with all my heart and soul.

I am a daughter, who strives to be what my parents dreamed I'd grow up to be.

I am a sister, who will always believe that my brother is capable of anything he puts his mind to.

I am an ex-wife, who credits so much of my growth to a wonderful man.
I am a worker, who tries to achieve what is expected of me.

I am a woman, who has accepted my ‘womanliness’ with everything it deserves.

I am a human being, who treats all others with the respect and dignity they are entitled to.

I'm not perfect. But I am me. And I'm amazing!

Say it to yourself... "I am amazing!"

Feels good, doesn't it?

Star-gazing

We sit outside on the porch everynight. It's our favourite time of day. We sit on our broken down old couch and light a fire to crackle in front of us . We face north and at a certain time in the evening, a bright star moves her way up over the roof top in front of us. We have watched her move through the sky, and she's been appearing earlier and earlier each night. We always comment when we see her - 'our star'.

Thanks to the magic of the internet and the iPhone, we found out a little more about our star. I used my Pocket Universe app and we tracked the night sky above us, then we googled and found her story. It's beautiful, and her name is Vega.

She is the brightest star in the constellation of Lyra, and will be the North Star in about 12,000 years. Vega was also the first star other than the Sun, to be photographed and the first to have her spectrum recorded. All interesting facts, if you're into astronomy. But I'm not quite so easily pleased. I wanted to know about her mythology. I found several versions, but the one that seemed to draw me in more was her Chinese love story. In this version, Vega is separated from her lover, Altair, and their children, and can only be reunited once a year in mid-summer. On this day each year the magpies build them a bridge, and across this, they meet each other through the Milky Way.

We've ruminated on Vega's story for a while now, and we look forward to seeing her each night and reminding ourselves of the power of destiny. Just the other night though, as we realised our visits from Vega were going to soon end, we noticed another brighter star appearing below her, rising in almost the same place. This star is Deneb. He is the brightest star in the constellation of Cygnus, and he is 60,000 times more luminous than our Sun. More significantly though, Deneb is the star that marks the magpie bridge that allows Vega and Altair to be reunited on that one night a year! The story was coming to life right in front of us.

So tonight, on the eve of my beloved's departure, as we watch the full moon rise in it's golden glory, and await the arrival of Vega and Deneb, we ponder on where he will find them in his part of the sky - 10,000 miles away from here. I know how Vega feels when she is separated from Altair, and I'm getting sad realising that I need to feel that way again for a little while.

I just need to remember his perfect words to me last night...

"Baby, it doesn't matter where we are, we can find each other in the stars".

Foolproof choc chip cookies

My friend Kelley shared this recipe with me a little while ago and I've since made them 3 or 4 times. It's a winner in this household and makes enough cookies to last almost a week. They're not something you'd choose if you're on a health kick, but at least I know what's in them, and a little bit of butter and sugar isn't going to hurt anyone if eaten in moderation. Well, that's what I tell myself anyway...

Let me share the recipe with you -

Kelley's Choc Chip Cookies

500 grams of butter

1.5 cups of sugar

1/4 cup sweetened condensed milk

4 cups self raising flour

1 whole packet of choc bits

Cream the butter, sugar and condensed milk together in a large bowl. Fold in the flour cup by cup and then add the choc bits. You'll need to get your hands in toward the end to form a nice cookie dough. Measure out walnut sized balls and place on a tray lined with baking paper. Using a floured fork, press them down lightly. Cook in a 170-180 degree oven for about 12 minutes. My oven is a little unpredictable so I keep an eye on them after 10 minutes so that they don't over cook. You want them a little golden but not too brown. Let them cool a little on the tray before moving them to a rack to cool. Or, if you're like me and can't resist, let them cool enough so you don't burn your fingers, and then sample them while the chocolate is still all melty! This recipe makes about 60 decent sized cookies, and they'll keep in an air-tight container for up to a week - if they last that long!

I Love You

There's so much that I love.

Right now I love this band.

The Benjy Davis Project.

Check them out -

Ebay gold!

This is my son. He is holding a rock that he found at school. He was doing something he shouldn't have been doing, in a place that he wasn't supposed to be. Typical. He was pretty pleased with his find though, and came home full of questions.

'What is it, Mum? Could it be fool's gold? Maybe a piece of moon rock? Or do you think it just might be scrap metal?'... We tested it's magnetic capabilities, pondered over it's make-up, and wondered where on earth (or space!) it came from. It certainly looked as though it could be any of those things.

He's a strange and curious soul, this little man, and his lifelong ambition is to be another Bear Grylls. When you ask him what he wants to do when he finishes school, he will tell you that he wants to be an explorer. He dreams of discovery and can't wait until he is 18 and will be 'allowed' to travel the world.

In an effort to keep those dreams of his alive, we decided to do a little experiment and see if he could make some money to start his travel fund. So we put the rock on ebay. People sell all sorts of stuff on there right? Why not a rock?

We watched the auction day and night, and while we all fantasised about it making thousands of dollars, or trading it for a house (remember the Red Paper Clip guy?), realistically we thought it might only reach our starting bid of 99c. Well, the rock sold for $26, and we had one very happy little boy. It was bought by a man in Central Queensland.

This was his eBay feed back -

"thanks item received as pictured good luck exploring to the young fella"

Who knows why he bought it? Maybe he collects moon rocks, or is a metal expert? Or maybe he just wanted to make a little boy's dreams come to life? It really doesn't matter though. What matters is that we did it. We tried something a little bit 'out there', and it worked. At the same time, we also showed our future world explorer, that if you want to succeed at something, you first need to give it a go!